12 Inches of Snow



       Ah Snow, who in 1993 wasn't captivated by youre whiteboy reggae and inexplicable lyrics. How a man gets famous for the fact that he's some canadian white boy who think's he's Shaggy, I don't know, but oh how stupid we were in 93.

       Im not going to talk about Informer or Girl I've Been Hurt, because those were the radio hits, and we all know that the true gold on any obscure album from the early nineties lies in the filler. And boy is this album ripe with filler. Runaway, Champion Sound, and Drunken Styles are three throwaway tracks as you can't understand any of the words, and theres not much music except for the drum machine but still, its over 12 minutes of drum machine and unintelligible reggae rapping, and where else can you find that?

        Lonley Monday Morning is awesome, because its the same song as Informer, except that its slower and with more emphasis on Snow getting a body cavity search. Who doesnt want to listen to that, and If thats not enough, the last track of the album is the REMIX of Lonely Monday Morning, which is Lonely Monday Morning sped up to a tempo a little slower than Informer, again with emphasis on police looking up Snow's bottom

        The best song on the album, and I say best because not only does it steal lyrics from both Informer (and therefore by extension Lonely Monday Morning) and Champion Sound, but has a chorus that says "all i wanna uh uh in you". Thank you Snow, for making this album, not only did you influence an entire generation to licky boom boom down, you also paved the way for further technopoppy reggae giants like Ace of Base. And I think I speak for the entire generation who bought this album in 1993 by saying that we are all sorry that the police pulled down your pants and looked up your bottom.